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The One Question That Made Me Stop & Exhale Gratitude

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I was scrolling through Facebook the other day and I read a post that a friend of mine had shared. The final sentence caught me off-guard because rarely do we ask ourselves the truly hard questions.

I read and re-read the last sentence in the post. I made myself a coffee and I went and sat in my backyard on the swing. I thought and I thought about the answer to the question asked and exhaled a breath of gratitude when my answer was “Yes.”

The question was simple but thought-provoking:

If you died today, would you be happy with how you lived?

– Sheri Bialecki

You see, the past few years have been extremely difficult. My child was suffering, my marriage was broken, my business was extremely stressful and I had become someone I didn’t recognize (or like). If that question was presented to me a year ago, my immediate answer would have been “NO”.

But today, after careful thought and consideration, my answer is “Heck YES!”.

I’ve made some huge and hard changes in my life. I stepped back from a business I created and loved with all my heart. I still love it and will always support it, but my path is a new one now.

My marriage is getting stronger every day and there is laughter back in our home.

My child is getting the help he needs.

But, the best part? The best part is that I can breathe again. I’m doing things that make me happy. I’m doing things that help people…maybe not on the empire-building scale I was previously working towards – but on a level that fills my heart and soul.

I have time to sit with my kids and laugh and play. I have remembered how to be silly and light. I get to say “fuck” and not be judged…and if I AM judged…I don’t give a fuck…you’re probably not my people, so move along.

I’m comfortable with who I am as a Mother.

  • My heart and soul.

I’m comfortable with who I am as a wife.

  • He does exist. Proof.

I’m comfortable with who I am as a professional.

  • Pretty much how I look doing fitness program design…every time.

I’m even comfortable with who I am as a friend and I cherish those near and dear to me.

  • Taking more time to be with my amazing friends.

I’m comfortable. And, although not every day is rainbows, hearts and glittery unicorns (if only!)…if I was to die tomorrow, I would be happy with how I lived my life.

Though, I would regret never getting to Africa. That’s still a big one to check off.

I’m on the other side of a few really shitty, shitty years. But, I’m stronger and smarter and more dedicated because of it. I know who my true friends are and I know I can count on them. I know I’m a good Mama doing the best I can.

I also know I’m a good person and although I may have made mistakes in the past, I’ve grown and learned and become the person I am today.

  • I’m the person that inspires hundreds (thousands?!) of people to love themselves.
  • I’m a safe place for my child who needs a whole lot of love.
  • I’m the place my husband comes for love and support and laughter when he struggles with his own “stuff”.
  • I’m silly and quirky and loud and shy.
  • I’m the person you can, 100%, turn to should you need a shoulder and/or a swift kick in the ass.
  • I’m the person you can go to for a laugh or to sit and feel supported.

I get to be a lot of things for a lot of people. And, I’m finally in a place where I can choose who to allow in and who to keep out. I’m at a place where I get to live my best days with joy, hard work and a ton of perseverance.

I’m at a place where if I were to die tomorrow, I’d smile down (or up?!) at all of you (even the assholes) and wish you well. Oh yes, my answer would have been so different a year ago. So, I exhale gratitude for the trials I’ve survived and the place I stand in this moment.

I truly am a lucky woman.

#PushingForAwareness – Update on Our Campaign to Raise Awareness for Childhood Mental Illness

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We’re over halfway through our campaign to raise awareness for childhood mental illness and we’re still pushing away. Today is Day 30 of 50 and we’ve completed 50 pushups every single day so far.

Here’s a little background on #PushingForAwareness:

My son battles severe panic disorder, generalized anxiety, social anxiety and depression. He’s 10 years old and he’s been battling for a good 4 years now. Over the past year (before psychiatric diagnosis), he had to battle harder than I’ve seen anyone battle for anything.

After being on multiple waitlists and months and months of asking “Can I get help today, Mom?”, he was finally seen by a psychiatrist and diagnosed with his mental illnesses. He was prescribed medication to help him battle and he’s been rockin’ his meds for six weeks now.

We have great days and we have terrible days, but at the end of each day, I know he’s getting better. Although the hard days are extremely exhausting and heart-crushing, the good days are more frequent and help to restore our energy and our broken hearts.

While we were trying to get my son help, I found a serious lack of resources. No, that’s untrue. There are loads of resources, but I had no idea where to look. I had no idea how to help my son and I truly didn’t want to simply take advice from Dr. Google. This was my son we were talking about, he deserved real medical help.

I also found that supporting my son through the dark, dark times was extremely lonely. I often felt judged, alone and terrified. I didn’t know where to turn to get support. I was unaware of the resources available to families fighting for a loved one with mental illness.

But, we fought daily and while we fought, I found my son wanted to talk about what was happening to him and learn as much as he could about his brain. I also discovered his desire to educate.

One of the cool things about my son is that he is very, very open about his mental illness. If you want to talk to him about it, all you have to do is ask. He also loves to educate people on it. His teammates, his coaches, our family, his friends, etc. He wants people to understand what mental illness can look like and wants people to not be scared of it. He wants people to talk about childhood mental illness.

So, we created #PushingForAwarness to not only raise funds for organizations dedicated to raising awareness for mental illness but more importantly, to ensure the conversations about childhood mental illness are happening. We committed to 50 pushups for 50 days to help raise funds to support organizations we love that help kids and their families battle mental illness.

The Update:

As of today, we’re on Day 30 of 50 and we’ve crushed 50 pushups for 30 days. The goal is to continue on for 20 more days. We have raised over $3000 so far, but we have a ways to go to meet our goal of $5000.

Day 7 – #PushingForAwareness

We’ve done pushups at baseball practice, in the early morning, late at night, and this weekend, with the Victoria HarbourCats.

We’ve also talked and talked and talked about childhood mental illness and I’ve gone Live on Facebook almost daily with current stats on people battling mental illness around the world and the lack of funding, support and knowledge.

I’ve been criticized for being so open about my son’s illness but I find that one of the most empowering pieces of feedback. I ask for my son’s approval for every piece I write and he approves all of it. If he terrifies others by being so open, then I think we’re doing something right. People are scared that he talks about this so openly.

Let them be terrified. We will continue to talk. And me…I will continue to be the most proud of all the Mama Bears out there.

I’m beyond proud of my son for the effort he puts in every day with this campaign. He’s inspired so many. And, he supports others raising awareness for mental illlness. This past weekend, we met up with an Oak Bay Councilor who rode a stationary bike to promote Ride, Don’t Hide. It was great for my son to see that others are also working hard to raise awareness and funds for mental illness.

He’s the reason elementary school kids started randomly doing pushups on the playground and having a conversation about childhood mental illness. He’s the reason I’m writing the scary truth about mental illness day after day after day. He’s the reason so many people have donated to our campaign, or become fundraisers themselves.

He’s the reason for all of this and is kicking some serious ass.

We have 20 days left. 20 days to raise another $2000. 20 days to do 1000 more pushups. 20 days to talk and talk and talk and talk about childhood mental illness.

But…if you think we’ll be quiet about it after the campaign is done…you’re wrong. We’ll continue to talk. I hope you will, too.

Where does the money raised from #PushingForAwareness go?

As we’ve gone through the campaign, we’ve found four organizations that support mental illness and feel are a good fit.

They are:

Buddy Check for Jesse
Head & Heart SK
Stigma-Free Society
FamilySmart

Once the campaign is finished, Owen will decide how much money will go to each organization and present his donations to each. I can’t wait for that.

There’s the update, my friends.

1500 pushups done. 30 days. $3320 raised.

All to support and initiate conversations about childhood mental illness.

If you’d like to donate, please CLICK HERE. We’d appreciate any and all donations. Any amount helps and we’d be incredibly grateful to you for your support.

And please…share this campaign on your social. Please help us keep the conversations going and the donations coming in.

Thank you for your support, your kinds words and all the love you’ve sent us along the way. My son continues to battle daily and I stand beside him, sword drawn, battling his demons for him on the days he can’t. I’m proud to do it. I’m honoured to do it. But, he’s the real hero. He overcomes daily. He fights harder and has more grit and determination than any adult I know. He’s the coolest 10-year-old out there…and he’s the reason this campaign is going so well.

Thank you. Truly. Thank you for all of your support. xo

Cardio Workout: Lindsay Gee’s Super Sweat Sesh!

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I’ve wanted to create a killer cardio workout for you all for awhile now and I figure why not start the week off with a great workout?! So…I created the “Lindsay Gee’s Super Sweat Sesh”.

You’re welcome!

What do you need? Well, first and foremost, you’re going to want to get into the right frame of mind. Meaning, I want you to mentall prepare for a really good, quick, down and dirty sweat sesh!

The workout is 24 minutes long, not including your warm-up and cool-down.

Choose a piece of cardio equipment to conquer this workout, OR, fi you’re able to, take it outside on a road bike or while you run.

When I write “ON”, I mean that I want you working at a “9” on your Rate of Perceived Exertion scale. 1 being at home in bed, sleeping. 10 being maximal effort. So a level of “9” is just below your maximum effort and should be very uncomfortable. You should not be able to hold a conversation at a level 9.

When I write “OFF”, I mean active recovery. Please do not completely stop your feet and flop to the ground. Hop off the treadmill but keep your feet moving. Or, if you’re on a bike, cycle your legs uuuuuuber slowly. Recover. Your next set needs you back at a 9, so give your body a chance to recover and your mind a chance to recover and prepare for the next interval.

Are you ready?

Here’s the workout:

Fun, right? YAY!

Are you going to give it a whirl? I’d recommend writing the timings out for yourself and sticking them in a place that you can see clearly. If you’re out on a run or an outdoor cycle, set your intervals on an app and get to work. I like Interval Timer for these types of workouts.

Let me know if you try this! I’d love to hear how it goes for you! YAY! Sweaty fun

5 Days Of Health & Fitness Tips: Day FIVE – Energy Adjustment Required

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As most of you know, my son battles mental illness. Hard. This week has been particularly hard and I find myself exhausted, depleted, a little bruised and in need of a regroup.

While his panic attacks are not at all about me, as his support warrior, the energy required to help him is incredible. While I wouldn’t change who he is for an instant, even this shitty illness we’ve waged war on, I find myself searching for a way to fill up my bucket.

So, these tips are selfish tips. These are things I am going to do over the weekend so I can recharge and be ready for baseball on Sunday – an anxiety trigger, for sure.

Childhood mental illness is hard. These are the faces of two people who are over it for the week.
How we feel about his anxiety this week.

If you’re feeling a little blue, a little down, a little defeated right now…please join me and let’s energize together for a few days.

Here are 5 ways I’m going to rest and recharge:

#1 – Sleep. My days are very, very busy. And although I work from home, the demands are incredible. I am a “stay-at-home” Mom but I also have a full-time job. In order to fit both titles in, I start working at 5 am (sometimes earlier) and typically don’t go to bed until about 10:30 pm.

That’s not enough sleep. I know that. Don’t lecture me. LOL.

So, this weekend, I’m going to sleep. Although I won’t be able to sleep in, I wake automatically at 5 or 6, I will go back to bed when I’m tired. This usually comes at about 10 am. So I promise myself to go back to bed and have a nap this weekend.

I’m going to nap!

#2 – I need some time with my bestie. No one knows me better than my best friend and no one makes me laugh and relax better than her. We’re going to get together, let the kids do whatever the heck they want, catch up on the Bachelorette (mindless tv that makes me cringe is my jam) and have a glass of pinot grigio (or 3).

I will laugh. I may cry. But at the end of our time together, my soul will be lighter and happier. That is the magic of my best friend. She’s mine…you’re going to have to get your own.

#3 – I’m going for a run. Running is a meditative time for me. Not on purpose, it just happens. I put my earbuds in, crank my country music (judge away, I grew up with it and it makes me happy) and I let my mind rest. T

This weekend I will do a nice little 8k run. More often than not, I come up with my next idea for my business on my runs because my mind opens to all the things. Or, sometimes the opposite happens and it totally shuts down and I just run and run. When I’m done my body, mind and soul sigh with relief and joy.

#4 – I’m eating the damn peanut butter cups. During the week I don’t eat sweets and I watch my sugar intake. So, peanut butter cups are off the table. Well, as of 4 pm today, I’m on “Fill Your Bucket” time.

Fingers crossed the peanut butter cup fairy shows up…otherwise, I’m off to the store to stock up. Hello, Big Cups! I’m eating them up and there will be zero guilt and all the yums.

#5 – I’m refusing to go to baseball tonight. My son adores playing sports but it is definitely the leading cause of his panic attacks. I’m not saying he has anxiety because of sport, in fact, I believe sport helps kids with mental illness in many, many ways. I’m just saying it triggers his anxiety to take over his body.

As his support warrior, the prep is most difficult. More on that in another post. Just know it’s a lot of energy expended to ensure I’m ready to support should he need me to guide him through a panic attack. It’s a lot.

So tonight, I’m saying “no”. He’s exhausted from the week. I’m exhausted from the week. So, we’re going to our friend’s house and we’re skipping ball.

Now, you may not have a sport to say “NO” to, but I bet you have something planned that you could eliminate and feel better for getting rid of it. Do that, do what’s right for you and eliminate the source of anxiety. Enjoy your time not doing the thing…at least that’s my plan.

There ya go. That’s what I’m up to this weekend. One of you asked how i re-charge and I think I have a pretty solid plan here. Will you join me? What are you going to tackle this weekend so you can rest your body, mind and soul and get back to you.

Because, you’re important. Your energy is important. Time to fill up!

5 Days Of Health & Fitness Tips: Day TWO – Nutrition

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There are so many tips I’d like to share with you about nutrition that even I get overwhelmed with the amount of information you should know about what you put into your body. From eating within 2 hours of waking to not eating after 8 pm, to limiting sugar, to fasting diets…there is a ton of information out there on what’s “right” and what’s “wrong. And, it changes almost daily.

But, there is one consistent tip that I have and people rarely talk about it.

Whether you’re on keto, you’re a macro lover, you’ve banned sugar, you eat according to a dietitian’s guidelines or you’re on some other “plan” that floats your boat…this one rule applies to all meal plans/diets.

Lindsay’s TOP TIP for nutrition:

It’s simple: Enjoy your food.

I could go on and on about certain programs and I could talk about why you should get rid of sugar. I could also give you timings for food consumption but at the end of the day, you have to take time to enjoy your food, otherwise, you’re going to feel like you’re going without. You’re going to feel starved and deprived and that’s when the shit hits the fan.

I despise diets and fads and crazy programs that don’t have you eating a very balanced diet…but I cannot fight the diet industry alone, so I’ll support you in what you’re doing. However, I will always, always, always tell you to slow down and enjoy your food.

If you’re banning added sugar, take time to appreciate the sweetness your fruit or yes, even some of your veggies have. If you’re trying new recipes to fit a meal plan, slow down and really figure out what you like about the meal and enjoooooooooy it.

Enjoy. Your. Food.

Don’t just throw it in your gob and not be present while you eat. Distraction is terrible when you’re eating. Mindless and rushed eating will most likely lead you to start thinking about your next meal within 45 minutes of your last.

Slow down, ya racehorse…and enjoy the taste, the texture and the experience of fueling your body in a healthy way.

I don’t mean you need to go full-on Remy from Ratatouille and analyze every bite you’re having, but I do mean that you should acknowledge how yummy your meal is and appreciate the nutrients you’re giving your body to get through the day.

via GIPHY

We’re so busy that food sometimes becomes just another thing on your to-do list of 1000. But, it’s an important one. This is the moment you get to fuel your body with the good stuff and set yourself up – body and mind- for success. Food is calories and calories are energy, so start thinking of food as your ability to energize yourself properly and FEEL BETTER.

Slooooooooow down. Enjoy. Enjoy all of it. Even the salads, the vegetables and the protein you should be eating. Enjoy your meal. Sure, it ain’t no wine and peanut butter cups, but it is still delicious and you need to appreciate it.