Over the past few days I’ve had numerous disappointing things happen to me. As an entrepreneur for four years now (yup, still a newbie, still learning), I know this is to be expected. The valleys and peaks of owning a business are ridiculous and can often leave you feeling exhausted, disheartened, elated and ecstatic (all within a few minutes of one another).
This entrepreneurial roller coaster is not for the queasy or faint of heart.
The past few days have been extremely…trying. Lawyers, finances (or lack thereof), demands, questions, more demands and yes, even more demands can leave you feeling drained, unappreciated and exhausted. I think people often forget that behind every company is a Founder who is just trying to make a go of it.
We are mothers, friends, aunties, daughters…plain ‘ol people.
Behind all the demands and chatting and talking behind backs, I beg of you to remember well…for everything you think we’re doing wrong, there are 100 things we’re doing right. Try to remember we’re people. Our best has to be our best every day. Anything less is noted and discussed. We know this.
As I wallowed in my disappointment (in others, not myself, which in and of itself is a massive business turning point) and allowed myself to feel lonely, sad and isolated I had to remind myself that for every 5 people who question my judgement, my drive, my mission and my purpose, there are 20 that don’t. There are 20 that believe and push and hope and pray for me.
After I had myself a good long shower cry (you all know what I mean…hot water, loud shower, lots of tears), I began to reflect on the power I held in my own life. So, here’s what I did…
I breathed. Deeply. I practiced gratitude. Then I decided to write about my gratitude. I wrote that I would stand tall, that I would be grateful even when gratitude seemed like something I would rather laugh at. I wrote the three things that I needed to be most grateful for and then I told the universe that I will succeed.
I realize that sounds Oprah-esque. But the power is mine and I needed to take it back. During moments of complete self doubt, aggravation and yes, anger, I needed people to know that every day is not awesome (nevermind the Lego song now in your head), that what they see every day is not what I feel. That some days, I just want to fold up, give up, walk away.
Now, I’m not saying that you need to tell everyone your problems and unload on every single freakin’ trial and tribulation you have. But, when you have moments that take your breath away, that make you question your purpose in life or what you’ve been doing for the past 4 years…well…it’s a pretty good time to reach out.
After I published my post throwing gratitude at the universe I almost instantly received a message from a dear friend “checking in”, offering support and loving me. I received almost instant text messages from my two best friends who both asked the very important questions of “do you need wine and who do I need to throat punch??!”. I was tagged on a number of posts from people who didn’t know what was going on but saw quotes that reminded them of me and my journey during this time of growth (because that’s what this is).
I was also sent a YouTube clip from another bestie and was told to take 4 minutes and just listen. “Be relentless and never apologize for having drive. Don’t ever apologize because you want more in life than average. You deserve more.”. Yeah…good one.
Good things can happen from bad days. This is the honest truth. You can find the support and the love and the kindness that you forget is there. But some days…you need to ask for it. Some days, you need to ask your tribe to remind you why you do what you do. You need to reach out and take what is offered.
And yes indeed, some days may, in fact, come in the form of wine and throat punches. If only in your mind.
So, to all my lonely, sad, isolated, challenged Mamas, entrepreneurs, business owners, daughters, sisters, friend out there…you’re not alone. Reach out, search and find the good things that can come from your bad days.
They’re there. But, you most likely need your tribe to help you find them.
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